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Reach Out

The goal of Reach Out with Acts of Kindness is to bring awareness of the importance of reaching out to others not only in times of celebration but also during troubling periods. It’s important to understand that everyone deals with a difficult time in their own way and in their own time; everyone is individual and unique. I share my thoughts and experiences as well as others who have endured hardships and whom I have spoken with for those on the outside with ways to offer comfort and support to those struggling.

No one is immune to challenges, and at the same time, no one should feel abandoned when experiencing a tumultuous situation. Reaching out is as simple as picking up the phone to touch base, sending a note of concern, completing an errand or task, delivering a meal, or dropping something off to brighten another’s overcast day.

Gratefulness

My book, Reach Out, launched yesterday, and it’s hard to find words to express how grateful I am for the opportunity to share my passion and voice on ways to help others in crisis.

I started thinking today about the word grateful. There’s no question that those dealing with hardship may find it hard to feel grateful when something in life goes awry, shifts, or becomes off-centered. Those struggling may not see any light at the end of the road, which is understandable.

I feel it’s important to take a step back at the end of each day and find one smidgen of gratefulness, even during difficult times. Perhaps you received a text of concern from a friend, you completed a task that was hanging over your head, or you simply got through a tough day.

At day’s end, can you think of at least one thing you are grateful for?

Cards! Cards! Cards!

I am a big promoter of cards (e.g., congratulations, encouragement, thinking of you, get well, birthday, anniversary, sympathy, etc.). What an effortless way to let someone know you are thinking of them. You don’t need to go out and buy a greeting card; a simple blank note with a handwritten message is perfectly fine and will be appreciated. It couldn’t be easier!

Reach out.

Listen

When someone is in the thick of a tumultuous period, sometimes they may just need a sympathetic sounding board. Can you be that person?

Listening to their concerns and worries may shed light on needs they may not be aware of. Perhaps providing a meal would be helpful, you might be able to complete their grocery list, drop off a prescription, return library books, purchase postage stamps, mow the grass, etc. Are they having difficulty going to and returning from doctor appointments or medical treatments, solving technology problems, walking the dog if the owner is away from the house for an extended period, etc? If needs aren’t readily apparent, ask what you can do to lighten their load.

Reach out.

Words

Words can have a lasting effect on anyone in crisis. Choose your words carefully to avoid any uneasiness although your intentions are genuine. For example, if a family is dealing with a troubled child, you should not talk on and on about how wonderful your child or grandchild is. If someone has recently lost a spouse, you should not talk on and on about how you spent your milestone anniversary or your upcoming vacation. If someone’s parent has recently died, you should not talk on and on about how you spent Mother’s Day or Father’s Day. This is common sense, yet thoughtless remarks continue to be made that can pierce the hearts of those in turmoil. Think before you speak so that your words offer empathy and compassion.

Reach out.

Friendships

I was in my early 20s when I heard if you can count on one hand the number of true friends, you are extremely lucky. I wish I knew where I heard this statement. This adage has stuck with me for over 40 years.

The saying some friends are there for a reason, a season, or a lifetime is spot on, although I have a hard time with this cliche. I place a lot of value on the relationships I have made and nurtured over the years. When the tables are turned, it’s eye-opening to see where people stand in the friendship world.

I consider a healthy relationship one of mutual respect and being there for each other. When life turns upside down and challenges occur, it’s interesting how some friends show up and others seem to disappear. Hardships reveal true friends.

What kind of friend are you? Are you there when someone’s world is joyous or when s__t hits the fan? Think about it.

Reach out.

Difficult Times

It’s at difficult times when family and friends are needed the most. Whatever support you can offer those struggling is paramount whether those affected are going through an emotional stretch, dealing with a health issue, experiencing the loss of someone dear, or another troubling predicament. What can you do? Oftentimes those hurting just need to voice their concerns or worries, perhaps a meal would be welcome, time away from the house or some other support that shows you care. Show up.

Reach out.

Acknowledgement

It’s important to “acknowledge” another’s difficult time. Failing to address a distressing period can be hurtful and, frankly, is inexcusable for those at the center of the troubles. There is no question that some plights may be foreign and perhaps horrific. The “elephant in the room” should never occur.

Addressing another’s tragic period is crucial. Approach those suffering head-on. “I’ve been thinking of you” is all that needs to be said and will be appreciated by those framed in turmoil. Step outside of yourself and set aside any feelings of uneasiness with words of empathy and compassion.

Reach out.